why should i give in? again??? did i need to do it again, for the countless time, i am sorry.. i am tired with it and just let time decides it. i dont think it was my fault, so i resist to say sorry to her, maybe she feels the same, she feels that she is not guilty. but when i come to think about it, does she really cares about me? moreover, she changes lately, she is no longer the same. there is somehting behind her eyes, her smile and her words. i can not help this doubt to fade, i feel really inconvinient about it. somehow i feel like, i am nothing in her life that she just dont care, i am here or not.

i hate it when we have fight, but, for god sake, i still love her, as a sister and a friend. it just that, my heart can no longer stand the pain that i bear when she treats me condescendingly, i dont know what i have done that causes her to treat me so different, but i am just tired of it. there is no use to cry, somewhere there, she is not even thinks about this conflict that happens between us, she has changed for the reason that i never know.

confront her?.. i am not so sure about that opinion, i dont know what to say anymore. all these while, it has been a real painful. i dont want to be a crybaby anymore. ok.. i think we should take time to realise about all these, about what we have encountered for so long, u c.. if you are not that close with someone, you will have no reason to fight with her or him, but, since she is my beloved sister and friend...aaa....i should be more patient now..

it just painful!!!

i was busy with my life, a lot of things are happening, and they are mesmerizing, that is the moment where i thought that everything will be just fine, just as proper as what i have been planning for. but it was a momentarily delight, sometime i just hate being so optimistic with the future because the moment i feel so, it will live a bad taste in mouth. it was just painful and it hurts me deeply. i feel collapse and i just hate it, huhu.. feel like i have so much reason to cry to now!

but..
i would not..
by nay chance..
let anyone to plant the seeds of doubt in me..
because..
i am one..
and still i ma one..
i cant do everyhting..
but still i can do something,
and because i cant do everything..
i refuse not to do the things that i can do..


be strong!!!!!!!!!

this sem we are going to have our final exam., and this is the final sem for the foundation year!
i should do my best!
aja2 fighting!!!!

it just painful!!!

i am under pressure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

this monday is the day, the day where i will be sitting for my mock exam!
i am very nervous and i just dont know why? everytime i open my book, i dont know which part to start and what should i study!
this is bad, knowing that i must study, yat i havent start yet! huhu.. God bless me, i am so nervous that i cant feel what actually i feel now, i feel everything has change so rapidly now, i feel so blur, i have no idea on what happen around me, everybody has been struggling a lot, but, i am just sitting, my english has become even worst.. i feel sort of despair, i know that i shouldnt feel so, but, u see, i just dont understand....huhuu,, feel like want to cry..owh my goodness...

huhu..
i am very tired, i have just get back from our discussion on fairy tale at mosque, its nearly 1 when we get back just now.. day after day, i am moving closer to the mock exam, and i am afraid that.. i din have enough preparation for it, owh.. social study!
i have just started the interpersonal skills, sometime i feel confuse, because when i have gone through the text rite,sometime i have the tendency to mix the fact.. and it is annoying,,
i din have much time left, i must struggle very hard,, next week we will be having a test regarding short story. and i really need to read it again, though i have finished review during the holiday, i still need to read it again, to intensify my understanding
i really love social study eventhough it kind of difficult and require a lot of effort.. i just like it..

what mind can concieve or believe, mind can achieve...

finally,
the second semester has started!!
after a long holiday and so called 'self-pampering',
i am quite regret that my nearly 2 months holiday has been such a waste of time, i hardly study, usually when i open my book and started to read, after a few minutes, i will fall asleep, but luckily, i did my revision on English study. this second semester will surely become the unforgettable memory for me as a TESL ian, because in this semester, we will be having a mock exam, this is the first exam that we will be sitting on, and all of us really need to give our best effort to score in our mock. the result will soon be an indication of our level, whether we are qualified to continue our study in this course.

this is the second week of the semester, we already assign with a lot of assignments,
however, this semestre we no longer have our thinking skills with mr. salleh and we gonna have islamic studies with ustaz ali for the muslim,
so far, in this 2 weeks, we have seated on 2 minor test, one is the resit and the second one is the test regarding what we learn during the second half of the semester,

i really hope that i will score better in this test, well, i am hoping for the best,
in this semester. i am having a group discussion to discuss about all those grammar thingy and it really help....

ATTENTION!!!!

THE MOCK EXAM WILL BE ON 3RD - 7TH OF MARCH

SO BETTER START DOING THE REVESION FROM NOW,

ITS NEVER TO LATE..

BECAUSE ITS NOW OR NEVER..

its holiday!!!

it has been 2 weeks since the holiday starts!
and it has been 2 weeks i have been away from college and all my friends,

holiday is a holiday,
book?
assignment?
journal?
novel?

huhu...
these are things that need to be considered too..

5 years is not a really long time, its only the matter about how many times you blink your eyes!

it is actually 5 and a half year, but, we have gone through the half year successfully!

so 5 more years to go darling!

about my holiday, em.. everything goes so far so good, i havent finish reading the mocking bird novel by harper lee, i have started to become worry because, 3 more weeks to go before i came back for the new semester!

i want to finish my work! but sometimes i come to realize that, i sleep tightly with my books in front of me...

........
try again!